Professional massage can serve as a comforting, therapeutic experience during the toughest of times.
Grief is a profound, life-altering experience that impacts much more than just a person’s emotional well-being. In the United States, a cultural discomfort around the topic often leaves individuals feeling isolated or stuck in their healing process.
Massage therapy can serve as an ideal outlet for releasing grief; however, it can often be an uncomfortable experience when emotions begin to arise. Understanding how grief physically impacts the body allows you to relax into a safe, effective experience that provides real relief.
The Physical Impact of Grief
Grief triggers an intense, long-term stress response in the body. When a client is navigating loss, their system is flooded with stress hormones like cortisol, adrenaline, and norepinephrine. This chemical imbalance can manifest as:
- Severe physical pain: headaches, muscle stiffness, and joint aches
- Systemic disruptions: poor sleep, cognitive impairment (“brain fog”), and digestive trouble
- Immune suppression: an increased vulnerability to colds, flu, and infections
- Decision fatigue: overwhelming mental strain that leads to choice avoidance or apathy
Grieving individuals frequently disconnect from their bodies to survive the emotional pain, or because they are busy handling logistics that often accompany the difficult experiences that lead to grief.
The Science Behind Tears
Emotional tears possess a fundamentally different chemical makeup than everyday lubricating or protective tears, acting as a biological release valve during intense grief. Landmark research pioneered by biochemist Dr. William H. Frey II established that emotional tears contain significantly more protein-based hormones and stress byproducts than reflex tears (like those caused by cutting an onion).
When processing major loss, allowing yourself to cry triggers measurable physiological shifts that support psychological healing. While baseline tears are 98% water, emotional tears carry a concentrated payload of metabolic waste and neurochemicals:
- Adrenocorticotropic Hormone (ACTH): This hormone triggers the release of cortisol during periods of high psychological stress. Shedding emotional tears physically removes ACTH from the system.
- Leucine-Enkephalin: An endogenous opioid and natural painkiller. Its presence in emotional tears directly blunts both physical and emotional distress.
- Prolactin and Manganese: Emotional tears contain elevated levels of manganese (a mineral linked to mood regulation) and prolactin (a hormone tied to the emotional response system).
- Unique Crystallization: Under a microscope, the varied chemical profiles cause grief tears to crystallize into entirely different, jagged structural patterns compared to tears of joy.
Grief places the human body into a prolonged state of physiological stress. Research shows that the physical act of crying actively reverses this survival mode through several biological mechanisms.
How Massage Can Help
Getting a massage helps with grief by easing the heavy physical tension that sadness stores in the body. Safe, caring touch lowers stress hormones like cortisol, calms the nervous system, and offers a quiet, non-judgmental space where a person can safely rest, breathe, and release bottled-up emotions. Additional ways that massage can help with grief include:
- Relieves tight muscles: Grief often causes aches in the neck, shoulders, and jaw.
- Lowers stress: Gentle touch reduces stress chemicals and slows a racing heart.
- Improves sleep: Deep relaxation helps counter insomnia caused by emotional distress.
- Reconnection: Loss can make people feel numb or disconnected from their physical selves.
- Reduces isolation: Safe human touch provides comforting, wordless companionship.
- Allows release: A quiet room gives space for safe crying or emotional processing without pressure to talk. [1, 2]
References
https://www.bibalex.org/SCIplanet/en/article/details.aspx?id=19105
https://urban.co/en-gb/blog/massage-for-grief
https://www.amtamassage.org/publications/massage-therapy-journal/massage-for-grief
